Newsletter

Any post cards I might have sent to you all so far would have been of snow, snow or my computer screen. Instead, I thought a written update describing the first phase of our sabbatical might be more informative. In mid January I participated in a weekend of consulting with the Bismarck/Mandan Unitarian Universalist Fellowship in Bismarck, North Dakota. Of course when I called my contact, Carol Jean Larson, on Friday it was 40 degrees and sunny. By the time my plane landed Saturday noon the temperature had dropped to minus three and snow was falling. The snow persisted the entire weekend, but that didn't dampen attendance at our meetings. Along with a congregational visioning meeting Saturday afternoon and a Religious Education meeting Sunday afternoon, I also joined them for a Saturday night pot luck and Sunday morning Soup Lunch and provided the Sunday morning program. The conversations were heartening as this group looks at who they are and where they want to go. This group serves a vital role in a community in need of a strong liberal religious voice. I was pleased to offer my time toward their cause.

The next weekend I was off to St. Louis. While the temperature didn't fall below zero, it didn't get above freezing either. So much for going south. This trip was the second training session for Conflict Engagement and Right Relationship teams. I also attended training last year with the team from our district. This year we explored mediation methods with a professional mediator from the Lombard Mennonite Peace Center. Our group also discussed the workshop we'll be presenting at the district meeting.

In between these events I've been doing lots of planning, writing and reading. One of my first tasks was to finish my course outline for the independent study of Celtic Spirituality and getting it to my advisor for his approval. That done, I had to start reading the books I'd assigned myself. Choosing the appropriate books required some research on my part. This task was greatly aided by contacts at Edinburgh University and the Shamanic Centre, also in Edinburgh. I've completed five of the assigned texts, about half done. A great deal of the course will be experiential in nature - during phase two of the sabbatical.

When my nose wasn't in a book I was usually tapping on my keyboard. During January I finished revising one group of writings that needed polishing and sent them off to an editor for review. With one project done, I started a long-delayed book project that seems to move in fits and starts. I'm reviewing sermons from over the years, trying to gather a group to take with me to Scotland. They will be needed as I will be speaking at the Unitarian Churches in Edinburgh and Glasgow.

Preparations for my trip to Scotland have also taken a good deal of time. All of the preliminary contacts from last fall required follow up, usually more than once. My research on useful classes and locations led to reservations being made. I'm also set up with a small pipe instructor and a "teaching weekend" in the lowlands.

By the time this newsletter reaches your homes I will be in Scotland and be immersed in phase two. I again thank you for this opportunity to pursue study in such an intensive and focused way. I look forward to seeing you when I'm back.

Brian

Cheers,

Are you looking forward to spring? How about Spring Break? If you are like me, you spend much of your time looking forward and looking back. As I write this, I am looking forward to visiting my brother in Utah for his 40th birthday. As you read this, I may just as well be looking back fondly at the time spent celebrating with him. While these experiences are pleasant to ponder, the bulk of my looking, both forward and back, can create unwanted drama in my life.

Looking back, it is easy to focus on the unresolved hurts and scars that each life bears. With these reflections, the present moment is blurred into residual emotional shadows. It is simple to confuse past memories with current identity, and difficult to remember that while our past can shape us, it need not define us.

Looking forward can easily be as hazy when consumed with worry. What if this, or that, happens? How will I react or cope? The mind seems to be able to worry automatically, without any input from us. It can project the best and worst possible outcomes, and leave us anxious with each passing moment.

But what if we could turn off our minds and just be present now? Right now, my senses are alive and I am connected to something much deeper than fleeting thoughts. As I observe my thoughts and disconnect from them, I find the true essence of me, as a being of presence and energy. I am open to the unfolding moment, living and doing with intention.

The trees of spring do not think on past seasons of drought or flooding. Nor do they worry about potential frost or how many leaves they will produce this year. Stand with a tree, and you stand in the presence of life energy, of being. For a tree, past and future do not exist. The time is always now; the moment is always now.

If you are still looking forward to spring, (and who isn't?) you are using your present moment to ponder. Bring yourself back to the full richness and aliveness of now. This season I wish for you the eternal spring of the eternal now ... and now, and now, and now ...

Rich

The YAC (youth-adult committee), Brian, and I discussed a vision for a stronger, better defined, and more meaningful youth program. From those times of visioning we have developed ideas for the Coming of Age program's move to 7-8th grade level, a yearly senior high mission trip, more focus on consistent social action programs, and interfaith work. The ideas are fun and exciting to hatch and they are based on the developmental needs of young and older adolescents (7-12th grade).

Many of you may be familiar with the developmental models of Piaget, Erikson, Kohler, Gilligan and Fowler. All of them are based on stages through which humans develop their intellectual, moral, and spiritual wisdom.

As we develop programs for youth it is wise to consult these models to see if we are meeting the needs of our youth. Erikson suggests there are crisis/conflicts we each have to meet and hopefully resolve before we can become whole and healthy humans. Adolescents are confronted with "identity v. role confusion" as their conflict to resolve. How can a faith community lend support in helping the adolescent develop a strong, independent, and positive sense of identity? We can offer examples of UUFA members or historical UUs who have demonstrated these qualities (Teach in RE). We can listen. (Be a mentor) We can affirm their thoughts, wishes, and hopes. We can help them clarify choices and decisions. (Be an OWL leader) We can greet them by name each Sunday and have a short chat with them.

Fowler suggests there are 6 stages of faith development, and that young adolescents (through 8th grade) are in the stage of "synthetic/ conventional thinking". They are able to synthesize the myths and stories of their culture into their lives but in a less literal way. They long for an ultimate reality/God that they may picture as a companion or friend, one that provides them uncritical self worth and a sense of security and order. They are beginning to establish an identity apart from home and more attuned to peers even while they are aware of the inconsistent and sometimes hypocritical nature of some peer relationships.

Older adolescents are in the "individual/projective or reflective" stage. Here they may develop a more individually constructed faith. They are able to reflect on their thoughts, question the belief systems they've accepted with more personal authority, and as they become more of aware of others' needs, offer themselves in service.

How does the UUFA address or incorporate these stages of faith development? With younger adolescents we still tell "our UU story" with full conviction that it can help them develop into secure and mature human beings. We offer the" Our Whole Lives " sexuality education program to help them make informed and safe choices. We will offer the Coming of Age program to help them use a faith vocabulary that is inclusive, respectful and appropriate to their growing spiritual awareness. We can offer them social activities where they can be with peers who have similar beliefs and values.

With the older adolescents in senior high we recognize their autonomy and individuality by including them in leadership positions and in planning and being accountable for their own programs. (Board of Directors, YAC, Youth Sunday, Mission Trips, teaching RE etc.) We hope to encourage them to put their faith into action with the mission trips each summer and with planning monthly social action Sundays. We plan weekend retreats where they can let go of responsibilities and indulge in reflection. Perhaps with a strong UU identity they can develop interfaith projects with youth of other faiths to demonstrate respect and common goals.

If you're a parent of a teen and he/she asks you about the necessity of coming to the Fellowship each Sunday you might think of these replies:

• Spirituality is energizing — keeping up or competing or hanging out with other friends can be exhausting. Taking time for quiet reflection and topical discussion can give you energy. Being warmly greeted, welcomed, and valued by others simply for being ourselves is energizing.
• Spirituality is a way to freedom — we can emancipate ourselves from the drudge of work/school/judgments.
• Spirituality can lead to enjoyment of life---seeking answers for ultimate meaning in life can help one find purpose. We can discover what we are perhaps meant to be or do and that gives us joy.
• Spirituality helps us cope with life and death — Belonging to a faith community replenishes our emotional reserves that may be drained from daily encounters with stress, hurt, confusion, etc. The same community holds us close and promises comfort and constancy in meeting death.

"It's not the years in your life, but the life in your years that matters" — Adlai Stevenson

Benette

One of the tenets of our Green Sanctuary Application states that we will sponsor workshops on the environment as well as promote programs on Sunday morning. We are considering sponsoring a series of meetings on "Simple Living" this spring. There would be as many meetings as we feel we need to do this topic justice. I have a book called Living More With Less. Even though it has a Christian outlook, it could be adapted for a workshop here at the Fellowship.

Part One of the book talks about five life standards. These are: Do Justice; Learn from the World Community; Nurture People; Cherish the Natural Order and Nonconform Freely. These standards emerged from Part Two materials that people submitted to try to make their lives simpler. These include topics such as Money; Clothes; Homes; Homekeeping; Transportation & Travel; Celebrations; Recreation; Eating Together and Strengthening Each Other. I think there would be enough material for an hour or two meeting on each of these topics.

Our Social Responsibility & Action Committee would like to have someone commit to leading this series. We would need to know if there is an interest. If you are interested in a workshop such as this please contact members of our committee. You could also let Ellen in the Fellowship office know, and she can get your name to us. I think that the five life standards they talk about sound a lot like our seven principles!! You would not have to attend all the meetings, but if you are interested in any of these topics, please let us know.

Also in the interest of conserving energy, we need a volunteer to put a "jacket" around our new hot water heater on the lower level. It is a large one so a cover would need to be made. Please contact Ken Lane if you could do this.

Erv Klaas & Lynne Van Valin

Aren't the new and refurbished areas nice! It's an exciting time for trying out and furnishing the new spaces. Annette Rowley, Jill Guffy and others have been busy selecting and modifying draperies, blinds and other furnishings to provide an attractive, welcoming atmosphere. Their efforts and talents are appreciated! We're looking forward to settling into the decorated spaces, and I encourage dialogue on the best use of them.

Plans are brewing for an in-house ribbon-cutting ceremony in a month or so by the special committee for this. Ideas are welcomed by committee members Bonnie Bowen, Mary Richards, Suzanne Zilber, Jack Vas and chair Clair Keller. We'll have much to celebrate! A dedication and welcoming ceremony for the community will be planned for September.

I remember having a scent-free seating zone in Fellowship Hall near the emergency-exit door and am wondering if anyone is having an allergy problem in the building now. Let me know if you are, so we can identify and remedy the problem.

Onward and upward!

The Space Cadets

On December 27, 1976, our lives were changed forever. As our family was journeying home from Lincoln, Nebraska, after having spent Christmas with family, a flatbed truck ahead of us stopped in the center lane of I-80 as we were passing Omaha at 72nd Street and backed up to pick up some lumber that had fallen off. Our little Ford van hit the back of the truck, fatally injuring 8-year-old Dusty and severely injuring Randy, age 13; Angie, age 16; and both of us. We were taken in three ambulances to Bergan Mercy Hospital in Omaha, where we four survivors spent almost eight weeks getting our broken bodies put back together. Our spirits were shattered.

Our Unitarian Universalist Fellowship organized immediately and helped us live through this terrible ordeal. The Fellowship was small then; maybe 35 attended on a good Sunday. People, whom many of the present congregation do not know, sustained our household here in Ames. They brought the youth group, called the FROGS (Friendly Religious Organized Group), to visit. Many made the drive through the winter cold and snow to visit us, bringing flowers and letters and hope and support and love. They comforted our family from Lincoln who came to the hospital every day. The Unitarians and the people in the community of Ames and Gilbert took care of everything.

When we were finally discharged from Bergan Mercy Hospital, three station wagons driven by three people from our Fellowship came for us and drove us home. Because none of us was able to care for ourselves, the help for us continued for the next five weeks with daily meals brought to us and our full-time family caretakers. We are forever grateful for the loving care so freely given.

Dusty's memorial service was held at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship, led by Susan Franzen. All the people who cared and loved our family came to say goodbye to Dusty. His ashes are in a box buried under the arm of my father, Lowell Jackson, who died in 1992. The Dustin Berger Memorial Library became Dusty's memorial home.

A room upstairs, now unrecognizable, became the first Dustin Berger Memorial Library. A desk and shelves were built, and books were purchased and checked out. Dusty Was My Friend was written by Andrea Clardy and dedicated to his memory. A copy was placed in the Ames Public Library. The cozy little room was used by the RE children for their service before class began. It soon became the RE directors office. The congregation grew, and more space was needed . The Dustin Berger Memorial Library was then moved to the Tower Room in the late 1980s. We purchased metal shelves for books and other items and furnished the room with couches and chairs and a coffee table. Dusty's charcoal picture done by Bill Zimmerman hung on the wall, and a nice brass plaque was placed on the outside door. Soon the RE desk and metal storage cabinets moved in. File cabinets, media equipment and a lot of miscellaneous stuff were stored. It was used for the high school classroom. The room was mainly used as a lounge and meeting room. It lost all resemblance to the original memorial library.

In 2003, a capital campaign was proposed for remodeling and expanding our Fellowship. The task so carefully planned and executed is now accomplished. The congregation, minister, RE program, and administration have grown and expanded into new and fresh space. The Dustin Berger Memorial Library is beautiful, spacious, and treasured as it matures into a functioning facility. A letter dated February 2003 from the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship president and board of directors reassured us that the library would be maintained as a dignified, designated library space.

It is our hope that intellectual and spiritual pursuits will have a home in this library. New and exciting books will be ordered and read. Children and adults will find comfort in the peaceful atmosphere for using appropriate media, perusing and checking out books, and perhaps looking up some history in the current archive collection. Tables and chairs will invite you to sit down and read or study. An endowment will be in place to maintain and continue the functioning of the library for the future.

The Dustin Berger Memorial Library is a tribute to the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Ames, to those who helped our family so very much, and to those who continue to uphold the same caring tradition of our community.

Kay and Roger Berger